Sunday, 24 June 2012

Lazy Stay At Home Mums

Cherie Blair has this week had a go at 'stay at home yummy mummies' (read it here) who make babies with rich people and do nothing for themselves.  Apparently people who make decisions to be dedicated mummies instead of deciding to benefit the wider economy by getting an education and a job are being dangerous with their life choices.  Clearly she is being more than a little close minded about life.

You will notice throughout my post that my statistics are 100% correct.

As much as I disagree with her it did get me thinking about stay at home mums in general, and how they are perceived to be lazy and have it easy.  And in my experience this view is 100% true (based on 1 out of 1 - therefore 100% - stay at home mum where I know about their home lives).  In comparison to those who work full time jobs to fund the extravagant and relaxed lifestyle of a stay at home mum, they are indeed very very lazy.

This post is 0% sarcastic.

I'd like to make it clear at this point that I work very hard.  I work Monday to Friday full time, with such focus and effort that it is exhausting.  My job is to sit down and talk to people on the phone.  Not easy, when you consider that I have to be very chirpy for the whole time.  It takes me a lot of coffee (which I have taught myself to like) to get through such a long day.  On a scale of 1-10, I work a full 10 in terms of hardness.  Which is why I consider myself the 'rich' (and sensible) partner that Cherie Blair is referring to.

Now the stay at home mum that I know (without mentioning any names, (@mummyadventure) is rather lazy. I come home from a day at work.  But unlike the other 99.9% of working dads, I do not come home to a lovely cooked meal.  Nor a sparklingly clean and tidy house.  I come home to her being a tweetybloghead.  Sat on the corner sofa with her legs up.  And when I get in I am greeted by a request that begins "Pal, while you are up...".  So I have to hop-scotch my way across the minefield of Dylan's left out toys to get to the kitchen to make Becky a glass of water.  Clearly she needs it.  She's had a tiring day.  And I cant sit down on the 4 seater sofa as the other 2 seats are loaded up with more bags than you could possibly have used in 1 day.

She has been very busy I am sure.  She tells me that she had to go to a baby group (to see all of her friends) in the morning, or to go for lunch with her mum friends in the afternoon.  Apparently this is because Dylan wants to see his friends.  Which in a way I can believe, as quite often Dylan is on his soft toy phone to his friends chatting away, and probably arranging social outings.

When I ask her what she does with her day, she mentions she "would rather play peekaboo than do washing up".  To be fair, she does feed Dylan.  She does clean up after him (although she always seems to forget about the mess he leaves in front of my computer every single day).  She also does his washing.  Although if you bear in mind that his clothes are tiny compared to ours, this is technically the smallest of jobs.

So I can see why people have the view that the stay at home parent 'has it easy'.  As it involves 2 long breaks during the day when Dylan sleeps (I only get 1 break at work). A big part of the day is often spent socialising with friends (the people I see at work are colleagues, not friends, except on Fridays when we go out drinking, and occasionally on weekends too).  Looking after a child is stress free (honest!).  You haven't got a fat man in a suit barking orders at you all day.  With the exception of advise from the ex prime minsters wife, you are pretty much free to do as you please.  And even at your busiest, you are playing with your child.  Playing.  How ghastly.

And I am sure you can understand my thoughts on the matter.  I mean, I have it so hard.  I have to work 9-5 Monday to Friday, and then suffer the same fate as the mother on weekends when the child is largely mine all mine.  I have to travel an hour to work, and an hour back from work.  I have to suffer tesco's bloody sandwiches almost every day year upon year upon year.  This is a hell all on its own.  I have to force myself into an addiction of coffee to create a sociable version of myself to get me through the unholy hours that happen before lunch time.  This is not a particularly cheap addiction either, at £2.40 a cup!  And then when I get home I have to cook us both dinner and then do the washing up.  Two whole things.  I mean really.  Could you imagine how a man would have reacted back in the 60's?  Violently, I am sure.  Fortunately times have changed.  Instead of violence I give her love and kisses.

I'll take you through a typical day in my job.  I get up early.  I mean really early.  Like 8 o'clock or something close.  I arrive at work have cycled through Canterbury town.  The fresh air is one thing, but the people cant walk in straight lines, this makes cycling very difficult through a pedestrianised high street. At work, I have to load up my PC, open like 8 tabs or so, remember lots of ever changing passwords, remember the ins and outs of the products I sell.  I have to talk enthusiastically to people all day in my practised baby voice (it seems people who run businesses are often not as clever as you may expect).  Then I have to remember to shut down my PC at the end of the day and navigate my way back through the high street of zombies.  Hard stuff, right?

Becky's day?  Socialising.  And hanging out with a baby who has no needs at all.  He is perfect after all.

But to spite my good will, I get told that I am so lazy!  Me?  Pah!  Too lazy to make my own sandwiches or take a flask of coffee.  Too lazy to cycle the full 16 miles home every day and catch the train instead.  So lazy because I don't cook a proper meal 7 days a week.  Yes, sometimes I want to only do 1 thing around the house on some days instead of 2.  And yes, I do feel justified in spending my own money on a luxury or two (the coffee, not the bloody sandwiches).  So here is my bucket, please fill it with sympathy.  And please write to Cherie Blair to explain yourself.  To explain why you stay at home and look after children instead of going to work to earn not quite enough to pay for the child care required.  

Oh, and in case you weren't sold already.  Becky only works around 8 hours a week.  How lazy!

So, to all those lazy stay at home mums out there, me and Cherie are on to you!

To read about the easy life of Becky please read her blog here -

To read about how easy a child Dylan is to look after please read my review of him - Review of Dylan

PS, don't read this post about the first time I had Dylan for a whole day.


  1. Brilliant! And that's from a Mum that was "stay at home" for 24 years (yes it does take that long!) before getting one of these job thingies.

  2. I called my blog A Little Light Work in remembrance of a comment that summed up precisely this situation!! So glad to have discovered this blog — it's a great read.

  3. thanks so much, I am glad you enjoy it :)


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